Blog Archives

Values in Eating Disorder Recovery

3/14/2023

By: Laura Deneen, LPC-MHSP, CEDS-S, NCC
One of my favorite parts of working with clients in recovery from eating disorders is doing the therapeutic work around values. I’m sure if I were to post a survey that asked for respondents to provide their definition of the word “value,” there would be a plethora of answers and opinions. For the sake of this post, I think of values as what we hold dear to our hearts and what drives the direction of our lives. Values move us closer to the things and people we care about and farther away from the pieces of our lives that are no longer serving us. Taking a meaningful look at values and what this means in the eating disorder recovery process may be a helpful part of your journey.

Identify what types of thoughts and behaviors are reinforced when you are in your eating disorder self. Ask yourself: what is important to my eating disorder? This oftentimes looks like rigidity, lack of flexibility around food, body avoidant behaviors, or compulsive exercise…(Note, this list is by no means all-inclusive, just a few examples). Another question to help determine what your eating disorder values: when I’m acting on my eating disorder thoughts and engaging in behaviors, how does this impact my mood, choices, or the how I care for myself?
Identify what values your recovery self holds. These values are usually in line with your authentic/healthy self as well. We can typically identify what we value by asking ourselves the question of “what is important to me?” or “where do I want to be spending my time.”
Notice differences between the two. Oftentimes, there is a significant difference between our eating disorder behaviors/actions/thoughts and our actual value system. Take time to reflect and marinate on this.

As always, I am rooting for you!
With love,
Laura

Anchored Counseling Company is a group practice specializing in the treatment of anxiety, depression, body image concerns, eating disorders & disordered eating, substance use, trauma and PTSD, and spirituality in Brentwood, Tennessee and serving the greater Nashville, Tennessee area. We are easily accessible for clients living in Franklin, Tennessee and Spring Hill, Tennessee.

0 Comments

Thoughts on Perfectionism

3/1/2023

0 Comments

By: Laura Deneen, LPC-MHSP, CEDS, NCC
The pressure to be perfect is very real in our world. Themes of perfectionism can cross over into areas including, but not limited to, image management, job, performance, being the “perfect” spouse, parent, student, or friend. Perfectionism can touch any part of our lives. Below are a few key points to consider reading this blog:

Perfection isn’t real. Of note, there is no such thing as a perfect life, or perfect human, or perfect job, or perfect friend. Busting that myth from the get-go is of upmost importance. This is so hard though, because of the lie we are sold on on a near-daily basis that perfection is real and attainable.
Why do we try to be perfect? Because we believe that perfectionism will help us in some way shape or form. Because we have a lot of shame that we are trying to cover up. Because we believe that if we are perfect, we may not go through hard things. Because our families of origin gave us the message (either implicitly or explicitly) that we needed to be perfect to be loved. The list goes on and on, and is person-dependent. Narrowing down your “why” around why you are trying to be perfect can be a helpful starting place for why you are trying so hard to be perfect. Increased insight around this means increased likelihood of shifting the pressure you may feel to be perfect.
How to help ourselves move through perfectionism

Self-compassion statements. Self-compassion has been shown to decrease perfectionism. Jot down your self-compassion statements: "I'm doing the best I can, " or "I did this (...) well," or "I'm learning as I go."
Do things imperfectly. This practice allows for increased flexibility, room for error and permission to make mistakes and to learn and grow from them. Doing something imperfectly also shows us that we can survive and thrive through imperfection.
Resist the urge to procrastinate. Perfectionism and procrastination are besties. You may have experienced the thought: “If I don’t do it perfectly, I shouldn’t do it at all.” The problem with this mentality is that it fosters erroneous thinking and prevents us from completing tasks, trying new things, being creative or taking a chance. Conversely, it may also lead to tasks taking longer than necessary to complete.

Your symptoms of perfectionism can improve; and, it takes true intention on behalf of the perfectionist. As always, I am rooting for you!
With love,
Laura

Anchored Counseling Company is a group practice specializing in the treatment of anxiety, depression, body image concerns, eating disorders & disordered eating, substance use, trauma and PTSD, and spirituality in Brentwood, Tennessee and serving the greater Nashville, Tennessee area. We are easily accessible for clients living in Franklin, Tennessee and Spring Hill, Tennessee.

0 Comments

Anchored Counseling Company’s Blog

Values in Eating Disorder Recovery

Thoughts on Perfectionism

Authors

Archives

Categories

Please reach out for support or questions about our practice!